21 Aug 2017

And Then That Phone...

I’m betting that after the post regarding my little nest of vipers wanting a new phone, you’re most likely not in the slightest bit interested in how we’re getting on with that iPhone lookin’ thingy. I’ll tell you anyway. Not too bad as it happens and below, for anyone still here, is wot I’ve discovered so far in Apple land.

Got the thing and went along to the service provider store to get a SIM and transfer stuff from the old to the new phone. Yes, they can do that they said and asked for her phone. Upon the old clamshell being passed over the young fellow said, “No. We need your phone, not your makeup compact.”

We leapt this obstacle like young gazelles and the job was  completed. Accompanied by  many chuckles from the staff.
”And how much do I owe you my man?” I pensively enquired.
”Free.” said he. We quickly left the shop.

Back home, unpack new toy, charge, turn on and first things first. “Hi Siri. Oh, and bu-by.” And off she goes.

Sadly, it seems the iPhone stores stuff internally and doesn’t look at the SIM. Or something like that. No biggie and soon had her contacts in place on the phone.

She wants her wallpaper that shows her phone number, right? Okay, I’ll Bluetooth the image over. Guess wot; iPhone only does selective Bluetooth transferring. Damn! I’ll E-mail the sucker. That worked and that was when I ran into another Apple peculiarity. Find the photo, discover how to set it as wallpaper and Apple then insists on zooming in. Damn. Dear Google...
Finally got it with trial and error by playing with varying sizes of boarder on the photo so that the zoom results in a perfect borderless picture fit. Boarder sizing was done on the laptop by the way.

Off to settings to sort out speed dial for her most used numbers. Damn! Nothing there! Dear Google...
Swipe right, as you do, and there’s a widget screen full of, not surprisingly, widgets. Wot to keep. Us? Delete the lot except Favourites. Then, in the phone book, add the priority numbers to the phonebook Favourites and there they are in the widget; a swipe right, tap an’ dial. 

So far, so underwhelmed. Whoa! Look at that big solid colour dock bar at the bottom of the screen! Off to settings to make it transparent. Damn! Can’t find it nowhere. Dear Google...
Say what now? It’s not allowed? All you can do is make it use a colour close to wot’s in the wallpaper and a little fuzzy? Damn.

Apart from that, it’s a solid little sucker and seems pretty swift an’ slick at wot it does. And Skype works good so she’s happy. For now.

The most exciting thing I’ve discovered about this here iPhone so far is that, amazingly, it makes and receives telephone calls! Really, how, like, cool is that then?

Quote;  Dutch Jones.

“Thank Siri when she helps, it's only polite!”

19 Aug 2017

And Then A New Candle Anthem...

With regards to the latest atrocities, this time in Spain, I note, without falling over backwards in amazement, that our ‘leaders’ have popped up in the media repeating the same hollow words they use every time. No change. It’d be refreshing to hear something along the lines of; lock an’ load; we start the fightback after coffee tomorrow.

However, there’s one thing to take note of in amongst their words, that being something along the lines of; “We stand together with our friends in {insert country}.” Think about that. With deranged white vans aiming themselves at large crowds, our ‘leaders’ are basically asking us to form ourselves into yet more large targets.

Anyhoo, I picked up on a toon on TV last night and after further investigation I believe this should be the favoured vigil anthem. It may, of course, already be in use; I have no idea as I’m not a great vigil attender as I believe a bomb trumps a T-light in any fight.

It has all the correct ingredients; a bear, kittens, politicians in the form of fat frogs, all the correct words such as  ...one thing is certain we’ll never give in. Side by side, hand in hand we’ll all stand together and as a professional vigil attendees appeasing bonus, it also has a chorus of, Bomb-bomb-bomb sung by the frogs thus it’s all inclusive and the bad guys shouldn’t be too offended. See? All sides happy and clapping along together to the same toon. And it’s pretty catchy as well. Wot’s not to like?

If you’re an atrocity aftermath party person, try this on for size...


Quote  Terry Pratchett.

“Contrary to popular belief and hope, people don't usually come running when they hear a scream. That's not how humans work. Humans look at other humans and say, 'Did you hear a scream?' because the first scream might have been you screaming inside your head, or a horse backfiring.”

18 Aug 2017

And Then, A levels...

I note the TV has been all over those kids who’ve managed to collect many ‘A’ level exam passes and it’s interesting to note how few of ‘em could string a coherent sentence together without, like, copious use of that, like, ‘like’ word. Let’s give that no never mind and wish them all good luck once they find themselves out in this brave new world.

It was also fascinating to see how the BBC film coverage managed to cram so many successful girls into shot that were wearing old fashioned headscarves. Pardon? It’s called a wot? Oh, right.

Head Rambles has the low-down on the latest BBC abuse of the TV tax and kids with regards to  their ‘program’, No More Boys and Girls. As he says in answer to a comment, “Could someone please stop the planet?  I really want to get off.”
He also has the sad news that the dedicated Blogger after truth, Anna Raccoon, has passed away.

Coincidentally, I made another blunder under the radar of news checking this morning and there was this to add to the ever growing list of sadness.  For the sake of my blood pressure, I really do need to be more selective in wot I read in these ‘enlightened’, nightmarish times. Sadly, I believe it’s only just beginning and we really do need somebody up there at the top to show some testicular fortitude and get a grip of the practitioners of this type of total lunacy right quick.

Exam boards are to change the way they compare the grades of boys and girls to include a category for students who do not identify with either gender.

Confronted with this signage, as shown in the above article, at my age, by the time I’d decoded it I would’ve  probably wet myself. Twice.


Anyhoo, her along the sofa is now the proud owner of a little iPhone and I’ll post later once I’ve played with it a little. Once I figure out how to turn it on that is.

Quote;  Stefan Bergman

“I speak 12 languages. English is the bestest!”

           Pete Seeger.

"Education is when you read the find print; experience is what you get when you don't."

17 Aug 2017

And Then, An Apple...

I was stuffing myself on the sofa, eating my curds and whey, when down came a viper and sat down beside me and stole my wallet away.
“I like phone I use for calling far away so now I’d like new phone for everything and say goodbye to little folding phone and old far away phone.”
”No problem. Next time we’re in the supermarket, pick one; there’s a bunch of budget phones out there.” Her expression resulted in me becoming aware of a jingling sound, not too far away, as of alarm bells.
”I’d like an apple...”
”Oh, right! I’ll pass the fruit bow...”
”...phone.” BONG!! Went those damn bells.

Who said slick TV and film product placement doesn’t work? Anyhoo, as we all know, whatever gender you’ve assigned yourself today, reasoning with someone assigned as female, a female who wants something, is fruitless and a pointless waste of weeks of your dwindling time here.

Luckily, she didn’t want one the size of a small TV and after a quick search I found one that suited her every desire. Here I must say that I’m quite excited about this as it’ll give me something new to find my way around and play with while setting it up for her and discovering, for myself, wot all the excitement is about that Apple products generate with the young folk as I’ve never, ever used anything Apple at all. Almost happy daze then. And how sad is that then?

As she’s an international jet setting viper – you seen Snakes On A Plane? – she needs one that’s SIM free and unlocked. I searched and found various retailers wot sell ‘em like that. Investigate further and you find that the phone will instantly lock to the provider of the first SIM inserted. Yes, you can unlock it but it seems that will void any warranty an’ such. Is that of any great importance in these scrappy days? Probably not but get one from an Apple store, or accredited Apple kit seller and, for a few pounds more, probably the cost of an unlock, they come SIM free and remain unlocked so’s you can switch SIM cards at the drop of a provider.

That’s the first Apple lesson learned and so it’s shopping day tomorrow.

Breaking: Seems another van with mental health  problems has run amuck; this time in Spain. T-light and teddy ready?

Quote;  ??

“Today even kids have iPhones. When I was a kid, I felt cool with new pencils.”